Recipe: Emotional Support Buttered Noodles

Pasta tastes better when it's seasoned with tears

Sometimes everything in your life gets upended, and there’s not a single fucking thing you can do about it. Parents fall out of helicopters. Old scars get sliced wide open. A chunk of spicy capicola accidentally gets shoved up your butthole. Shit happens.

So what’s a gal to do when the world repeatedly kicks her in the dick? She eats shittons of butter, cheese, and carbs. Sure, it’s a little sterotypical, but goshdarnit it’s a system that works.

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Better Buttered Noodles

• 1 pound pasta (I like Cascatelli, but use whatever the fuck you want)

• 1/2 stick butter

• 1/3 cup olive oil

• 2 Tablespoons white miso

• Maybe 1/2 teaspoon freshly cracked black pepper? I don’t measure pepper. Figure it out yourself.

• 1/2 cup grated cheese (I used Romano, because that’s what I had. Use whatever you’ve got.)

• Kosher salt

Bring a pot of well-salted water to a boil and add the pasta. Put the butter, olive oil, and black pepper in a large saute pan over high heat until the butter melts, then reduce the heat to low and whisk in the miso until smooth. Once the pasta is fully cooked, turn the heat back up to high.

Remove about 1/4 of pasta from the water with a wire strainer or tong, throw it in the pan with the miso butter, toss til coated, and repeat three more times. (The excess pasta water helps form the sauce.) Turn off the heat when it begins to bubble, then stir in the cheese. Give it a taste, and add more miso, pepper, or cheese as you please.

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